


I Do Love You

by lacunaxx



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Crying, Depressed Keith, Depressed Lance, F/M, Hurt Keith (Voltron), Keith (Voltron) Angst, Keith is a Mess, Keith/Lance (Voltron) Angst, Lance is an asshole, M/M, No Dialogue, POV First Person, POV Keith (Voltron), Pining, Pining Keith (Voltron), Pity, Sadness, Unrequited Love, klangst, tw: mention of suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-13
Updated: 2017-08-13
Packaged: 2018-12-14 19:28:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11789883
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lacunaxx/pseuds/lacunaxx
Summary: Trigger Warning:Suicide is Mentioned.





	I Do Love You

I paced around my empty room, tearing at the hair sprouting from my head. Choked sobs forced their way from my throat as I thought back to every last moment I had spent by your side. You had always been such an annoying flirt, yet I still found myself falling for you anyways.

Your caramel skin.

Your sapphire eyes.

Your  _ everything _ .

Each passing moment I had shared with you felt like a million years, but always, in the very back of my mind, you had never felt the same. Pushing, pulling, screaming. It was torture, being with you. Your radiance greatly surpassed every little broodingly sullen mood I had ever felt, bringing me joy and laughter. Not once had you glanced at me the way I stared at you.

I knew, yes, I knew that what I had trapped myself within was unrequited. The love I felt for you would never be returned. There had been no reason for it to be. Your life was filled with a dazzling happiness, faded only little by the bumpy paths along the way.

I was but a nuisance to you. Always glaring. Always frowning. The loner of the group. It had forever been a wonder how someone like me could ever imagine himself with a magical soul like you. Our paths were not meant to be crossed, and I knew that far too well. 

Racing pulses. Lovestruck gazes. Completely hopeless pining. Never to be returned. With each passing moment, with every little battle, with every jab or poke, I fell more and more. But at the same time, a small part of me was chipped away after you had begun to shrug me off like bothersome dust.

The others knew, as well. They could only look on with barely-hidden pity at every failed attempt to gauge even the tiniest of positive reactions from you. Of course, your annoyance had begun to rise as well. No matter what I did, the exchanges ended in a blinding chain of hateful screams, lined with blades to tear at my heart in the worst of ways.

I hadn't meant to scare you away. The words had slipped before I could manage to keep my mouth locked and toss the key into the void of space. Even as your face had twisted into an expression of disbelief, then to one of mortification, I knew that I had ruined every little chance I had with you.

But that's okay. I can see why you had stormed off without another word, leaving me to cry all on my own. Your friends had come to tell me that you were only stunned by my confession, which was a lie. We all knew. 

You only hate me. Your obvious disdain whenever I enter the room is heartbreaking, but I will manage just a little longer. I will find a way to shove my feelings aside. Just until the end.

The scars upon my ghostly skin mean nothing to you. Unspoken promises are left silent, unknown. With every planet we pass, I can tell you are swimming with the happiness of causing me unbearable agony. And I'm drowning in it.

A month has passed and we are on yet another planet. You have been gone for quite a while, roaming the area, finding others to flirt with. I cannot find it within myself to feel the searing jealousy once you return, a female alien wrapped around your finger. A girlfriend, you announce, explaining the details.

My vision had gone black. My breath had been held for too long. My conscious slipping away from me. 

And so were you.

Although, you had never been within my grasp. You had always remained a step ahead, so close, yet so far.

The girl is beautiful. She is unique, she is kind, she is lovely. She is not me.

Traveling on, I seem to find myself in every little place of which you two are sharing more-than-personal moments. With each time, I feel my own self slipping away. But I know, you have always wanted it to end like this. The others cannot deny.

And I cannot deny, that it is time for me to go. I am but a danger to the team, holed up in my blank room. Pacing and pacing, anger racing and racing.  _ I hate you, _ I tell myself, yet I cannot believe it. I must not tell a single lie. And I don't, of course. Even as I lose control, killing the one you said you loved.

Her lifeless heap lay on the floor, your sobbing form screaming at me to just  _ get away _ . I do. Only for you.

I cannot seem to keep myself a simple puppet. My strings have become tangled, needing to be cut. Nobody truly knows how I feel, their comfort reaching deaf ears. All I can do is watch as you crumble away, and I feel as if I am watching myself through a broken mirror.

I hear your cries, the thin walls of our rooms making them echo to meet my own.

After many unthankful months, I find myself in front of your door, the syllables of an apology ready to be spoken. I knock once, twice. No response is received. Five times. Ten times. A silent plea, a guilty prayer, falling heavy in the air once the door is breached. There you lay, your beautiful face distorted by the many tears of which you had cried.

I repeat my denial like a quiet mantra, although I already know what had happened. You were gone. You had loved her, I had killed her, and now you were with her. 

I fell to my knees and cradled your body one last time before releasing my sorrows within a single scream. Your family would never see their beloved son again. Not even a single farewell had been passed. They would search endlessly, only to find that you would never return.

And it was my fault. Everything was because of me. Because I had grown fond of you. Because I had become jealous. Because I was blinded by the fact that you would never love me.

And I would never stop loving you.


End file.
